homralings | Open RP Post

Fine is very different from good.

[And that's all he'll say about that. Tatara really doesn't know what time it is either, but Eric woke up so it's morning. Clearly. Isn't that how time works?

Well, he's not really one to talk, but...]

Talking helps work things out...or, at least, people don't worry quite as much if they aren't left in the dark.

[Unless there's nothing they can do in which case it'd be even worse! No point in worrying everyone about something they can't change or help with.

But Eric's problem was probably to do with the past, not the future. They can help with dealing with the past. They've done it before.

He shrugs, a small almost sad smile on his face.]

Whatever you decide to do, we'll be here to help if you want us. [Or need them. He's a part of their small family now.]

I'm good then. I'm fine...

[ He trails off a bit as he pokes his head out slightly as Totsuka continues. His eyes a bit wide and fearful but stubborn. ]

You're...worried?

[ He tilted his head a bit. Even though he's been with Homra for a while and this happened quite a bit, it was still hard to understand or think someone was worried about him. He hugs his knees a bit ]

...I know...

[Well that answer isn't likely to change any time soon with that method, so he'll change his methods of asking!

His smile softens.]

Of course I'm worried. You're a member of Homra, and a friend.

[You aren't there anymore Eric. You're here, in the bar, and all the rules are different.

It's good that he knows. Tatara smiles wider and reaches a hand up to gently ruffle Eric's hair if he can.]

You're not alone anymore. [No longer the only person who cares about him.]

[ Or you could just give up and leave him alone >>

His mind was slowly going back to being in Homra when Totsuka said that. Everything here was good, was safe, these were his ~~family~~ friends.

It got disrupted with the hand coming towards him. It kept flashing from Totsuka's hand to a not good hand from a memory, from a too recent nightmare, and it was hard to figure out which was which. ]

D-don't...[ He shut his eyes as he flinched back from the hand ] S-sorry...Just, right now...

[ He shakes his head to try and clear the other hand from his head. It was just Totsuka...just Totsuka, he was safe. Homra was safe. ]

It's like...so please, don't...

[Not gonna happen~ Eric's too important to be left alone.

Okay. Freezing and dropping that hand slowly back to his side.]

Alright, I won't.

[He pauses, thinking.]

Mind if I sit next to you?

[More comfortable than kneeling and less likely to get questions from other members of Homra if they look over. Sounds like a good idea to him, if Eric's okay with it.]

[ Too nice for your own good Totsuka.

Doing that, especially slowly, helped Eric out a lot. If he could voice his thanks for that he would.

He shakes his head, not minding if Totsuka sat next to him. ]

G-go ahead...

[ He mumbles it but goes into an even tighter ball, he was trying really hard to not be affected, he had been doing so well. He didn't want to be like before and be back there again. ]

[Better to be nice than to be mean and spiteful!

Okay. With a small smile, he gets back up onto his feet and takes the few necessary steps to sit on the couch next to Eric.]

Thanks.

[Just gonna. Casually sit here and watch the others until it has either a) been a ridiculously long time of silence between the two of them or b) Eric seems concerned about something more than the nightmare since he might react badly to questions about the nightmare so soon.]

Mmm...s-sorry...

[ Unfortunately for you Totsuka, Eric will be silent, not really trusting himself to being able to speak well or at all. He was mostly focusing on being able to breathe and to not shut his eyes if he saw a place that wasn't the bar. If the other noticed his mouth, Eric was quietly mouthing some words that looked like 'this is safe' over and over again ]

Nothing to apologize about.

['This is safe', huh? After a while, Tatara'll start humming a familiar song under his breath.

Nothing says safety like warm days in the bar with everyone there relaxing and the sound of a guitar and a voice singing, right? Right.]

[ Eric cursed himself in his head. Of course it was something to apologize for. He was suppose to be over everything, he did not want to have anymore of these nightmares or memories, damnit! He was suppose to better now...wasn't he?

...Ah!

The humming jolted him out of those thoughts. He glanced over at Totsuka a bit surprised. That song...

Eric slowly closed his eyes, letting himself hear the song better. Soon, he began to relax ever so slightly, no longer mouthing his chant. He began to even hum along just a bit, not every note but a few here and there, quietly. He wanted to hear Totsuka sing it.

Near the end, he opened his eyes. Though he was still holding his knees, still curled up in ball, he wasn't as tense, wasn't as rigid. He still had some fear and anxiouness, but most of it had melted away with the song. ]

[Maybe he should mention how he felt upon realizing that he could actually eat everyday after essentially moving in with Izumo and Mikoto except still sleeping in his own apartment at some point. It's been years, but he still gets struck by how they never actually go hungry.

Out of anyone, he might understand that skittishness around food the best. Blaming himself for everything was never something he did though, so he won't be much help on that front.

He smiles at Eric when he finishes the song.]

Feeling a bit better?

[ He could, it might help. He figures everyone here has had a more or less normal life.

He glanced over at Totsuka and gave a small nod. ]

...yeah...

[ He relaxes a bit more, a bit red in the face from freaking out again. But the memory had been too strong for him. ]

th-thanks...

Edited 2015-04-12 03:21 (UTC)

[Not sure what kinda normal Eric's thinking of apart from "wasn't forced into a gang". That's probably one of the only limitations Homra would mostly fit into.

Tatara shakes his head slightly, smiling.]

No problem.

[He won't bring it up right now though, not directly.]

Memories are strong things, so rather than trying to forget that something happened, it's easier to 'bury' it under all the good things that have happened, right?

[He's looking at everyone else, keeping Eric just inside his peripheral vision.]

If that's the case, we just need to give you a lot more good memories so that maybe you'll think of them first instead of all the bad.

[Not that simple but!!!]

[ No, no, that's pretty much it. They know more about more things so he figures they have led more normal lives.

Listening to Totsuka he sort of choked out a small 'heh' covering his mouth with his hand. There was a small smile playing about. ]

I don't think, it's that easy. But, it's helping, at least, right now.

[ He goes a bit quiet, putting down his hand and looking to the floor. ]

These ones...I would like to forget.

[That's not really saying much. Even with his abusive and neglectful upbringing, Saruhiko had a more "normal" life than Eric.

He hums a little.]

It's not, but it gives us something to do to help you when you don't want to talk about it.

[And a pause, scratching his face.]

Well, we've just gotta wait and see if you do forget. Getting amnesia wouldn't really help this out since it's possible you'd just remember again later.

So it'll take time. Since it'll take time, we might as well make that time as full of good memories for you as we can!

[He's not the best about this part. He always has just looked at the brightest part possible of the current situation. But good memories of precious people are very important, now that he's experienced them.]

[ That is true huh? They started off normal but when they joined Homra it turned into abnormal but even then they had more time living a 'normal' life then Eric had.

He tilts his head a little. ]

It's hard...to talk about them...

[ He nods his head. To forget just to remember them again would be even worse. ]

Yeah...

[More or less (less, mostly less) normal, yeah. Still more normal than Eric.

He extends a hand in Eric's direction, not trying to put it on his head or anything.]

We'll wait as long as we have to. We're here to try and help you recover, and to be a new place for you to belong because you want to, rather than have to.

[Speaking of good memories though...]

Do you want to do anything? Since you're awake now.

[ Eric watches the hand, just wondering where it was going The memory has faded so he was no longer afraid, but still...instincts. ]

...Okay.

[ He still needed to hear that every once in awhile, especially during a hard time like this. He felt like he did belong here, though. The most he's ever been.

Before opening his mouth, a small growl made it's way through the silence. He sheepishly tried to hide his stomach, but still looked up to Totsuka. ]

Uhm...maybe something...to eat.

[It's just kinda there. But hearing that Eric's hungry, he makes a thumbs up and laughs a little.]

Hungry for anything in particular? I'll cook!

[Kusanagi-san lets him cook! Isn't it great? Instead of mountain herbs and vegetables he gets to use the bar's stock of stuff that he's not quite sure the name of still.

Cooking is a hobby that isn't allowed to die. If it did, Homra would have way less food to eat whenever Izumo's busy.]

[ He looks away, a little shy. ]

Anything is fine...

[ Right now he didn't feel like choosing anything in particular. Nor did he feel like getting up to the counter bar unless Totsuka asked. He was still weird about the whole memory and he just wanted some quiet. ]

[A small laugh.]

Alright then. I'll bring it back here when I'm done, okay?

[Hmmm...what to cook.... Wanders into the kitchen. Soup? Something with rice? What is stocked in the bar that Izumo wouldn't miss too much if he used? Hm....

Ten or so minutes later, he returns with a plate of omurice. It's easy to cook and they have a lot of the ingredients, okay.]

Here you go!

Okay...

[ Eric sits and waits, relaxing a bit but also thinking. About what Totsuka said as well as about the memory that had decided to plague him this time. Talking about things helps get rid of them...huh?

Eric blinks as he sees a plate of omurice set in front of him. ]

Ah. Th-thanks...

[ As he got his spoon to dig in he paused, tilting his head ]

My mom...used to make this, when I came home from school upset... [ He frowned, only really remembering the hand and the dish. ] Or...maybe my dad...

No problem.

[Tatara decided there's no point in asking which parent if Eric's not sure. It'd only maybe distress Eric even more. But if he remembers eating it after coming home from school upset, that sounds like a comfort food.]

So you like it?

[ He mumbled an 'itadakimasu' and took a couple of bites, trying to not think about the past. He was here now and the food was good. Nod, nod. ]

Really good.

I'm glad.

[Casually sits next to him and watches everyone else so he isn't just standing there watching Eric eat??? I had no idea what to put in this bracket okay.]

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I wrote a tag and then dw ate it and I feel like this is worse

Rewriting tags suck orz but yours is good /o/

\o\ thank you thank you

/huggles

/snuggles

/nuzzles

I have no idea what could continue from those three orz

S'okay

/casually tags back a month later

/casually tags back and don't worry about it

so what if I wanna do a thread with Shouhei :|a

I would say awesome and I'm always ready owo

\o\ birthday thread start in here? I can do that after this one--

Sounds great /o/

sounds weird but \o\

Still sounds good don't worry

\o\

/o/

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o/